Well, its been over two weeks since i last posted my blog. its been a rather tense time for me. I am nearing the end of my summer training in Mumbai. It has been quite an experience for me , met some really interesting people . but one thing i really learned from my experience is don't trust anybody , i did that and I am suffering. i relied on my friends and they ditched me when i needed them most. well even though i refer to them as my friends but i hardly meant it now. the people whom i had never met before helped me , but those i knew ...ah what can i say .......god bless them. its friendship day but I am sorry to say , that i don't have any good friends left . I am alone . I try to find solace on the net where I have got some good people who really cares for me , but they are the people I have never met so , may be its too early to judge them . Anyhow may be the fault lies with me .May be I am not good enough for friendship.truly speaking I never did anything in my life that would have hurt someone . sometimes I even suffered for others. I am not self appreciating myself , but I am saying this from my heart. I cant see someone embarrassed in front of others , my heart cries when i see someone cry . I feel elated when I think I have been good enough to help someone . I know it seems rather like self flattery , but these are the things I consciously tried to put into myself , because these are what I picked from what I read since childhood. I sincerely believed that good can be trendy , and since I never had the talents that others had , so i never picked up their way and tried to find mine , and what i picked up as a child was to behave like a decent gentleman , like the so called grown ups . that made me unique when I was a child , but as I am seeing it now , the perceptions of grown ups in my mind was wrong . being grown up essentially means knowing how to make your way up , how to be able to get your way , even if you have to run over others for that. being grown up means shutting your eyes towards others and forward your own cheap interests . being grown up means knowing how to make others help you , and then forgetting the person. And last but not the least being grown up means make a lot of friends but never do friendship with any of them .
ah.. how sorry I am for being a grown up . enjoy your friendship day
